Everything, Everything | Book Review

Books. Something that was a foreign object to me growing up, but now has turned into my favorite past time. With school out for the summer, I have acquired more free time; not much, but enough to send me into bored fits. I think, since graduating high school I've grown to respect and appreciate the effect a book can place upon you; happy, sad, questioning, etc. Books can take you to a whole new world, allowing you're imagination to run free; forming a type of limbo state that only you can control. . . Anyway, I hope I'm not speaking gibberish. .

Recently, I spent yet again, way too much time moseying up and down the aisles at Barnes & Noble, and ended up purchasing 5 new books to add to my collection. I think I was antsy to grow my collection and to have a variety to choose from. Out of the 5 books I purchased, "Everything, Everything" by, Nicola Yoon, was the first I reached for.

I'll (try to) quickly give you a taste of the plot; Madeline, a teenage girl lives indoors, 24/7. She never leaves her house due to her illness, SCID. A rare disease that basically makes her allergic to EVERYTHING, and the triggers are unknown. To keep her safe and healthy, Madeline lives a scheduled life at home; school is done over the computer, her mom and nurse, Carla, take constant care of her, nights are spent playing games or watching movies; everyday generally repeating. Maddy has come to terms with how her life is and wouldn't change it, until a new family moves right next door, and the teenage son, Olly, catches Maddy's eye. Olly has a sister, but is a very minor character. His dad is basically an abusive alcoholic, and his sweet innocent mom tolerates him. You can tell that Olly is a family man since he is always standing up to his dad to protect his mother. (If you want the actual summary from the book all paste it below)

When I first picked up this book, I was intrigued by the cover. Simply white, with splashes of color and random chaos. I know you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover, but I can't help it. The title seemed quite vague, but intriguing and I had to know the plot. I will admit that I am a sucker for bad-boy stories (or just love stories in general), so when I read, "He's tall, lean and wearing all black-black T-shirt, black jeans, black sneakers, and a black knit cap that covers his hair completely." I was sold; Mainly because his physique/wardrobe had 'bad boy' written all over him...  I knew instantly that I would fall in love with this character and wanted to know how Maddy & Olly's relationship would pan out. Let me break it to you now, Olly isn't a "bad boy", in fact I'd say he's the opposite. 

I'm not really sure what I was expecting from this book in all honesty. I spend a fair amount of time glued to Wattpad (a website that lets amateur authors post their stories), and you can probably guess the type of genre I look for. . ^^ . . Don't judge, I'm a single, 20 year old, college student, what do you expect?! So, my expectations, probably weren't lining up with what this book had to offer.. BUT THAT'S NOT A BAD THING.  I am telling you right now that I fell in love with this book, and I will definitely re-read it down the road. 

 I can say that this book had me laughing-out-loud at parts where I could imagine myself in; more specifically, conversations held between the two. Maddy is smart and witty and strong. Olly is observant, collected, and mature. He  thinks about Maddy's well-being and doesn't play around when it comes to her safety/health. Throughout the book, you watch Maddy grow into the teenager she should be; crazed hormones, feelings for a boy, wanting to see the world in it's entirety. You watch as she experiences her first crush, her first love and risks she's willing to take to live a normal life. This book is powerful and so well-written, it's not what you'd expect. Once you start, you won't be able to put it down. In fact, by the time I reached the end I had tears in my eyes wanting to read more. Were they good tears? Bad tears? I wish I could say more about this book, but I'm afraid I'll spoil it... therefore, I HIGHLY recommend this book. 

Rating: 4.7/5  - I only wish there was a sequel or a bit more to it since the climax didn't happen until almost the end of the book.

**The pictures included are not mine, therefore, i do not own the right to them. They are simply a visual reference to give you a feel for the book.

Homemade Margherita Pizza

Who knew pizza could get any tastier!?

Rocky Road Cupcakes

I always love finding excuses to bake goodies, since I'm trying to stay on the healthier side of things, and over this past weekend it was one of my coworker's birthday. She told me she loves anything chocolate, and I thought about doing a big chocolate layered cake, but with my school schedule, I just couldn't find the time to make every layer. However, I settled for making these delicious rocky road cupcakes! 

I have been wanting to try making these cupcakes for quite some time now, so to hear of a birthday, was the perfect opportunity to whip out my muffin tins and baking bowls. 

I ended up using a chocolate fudge cake mix, since time wasn't necessarily on my side. I then whipped up a chocolate mousse, which consists of: 1 cup heavy whipping cream, 2 tablespoons powdered sugar, 1 tablespoon chocolate syrup, and a couple tablespoons of cocoa powder.

If you have a favorite chocolate mousse recipe you like to follow, go ahead and use that instead. I tried following a recipe that had you melt down chocolate and then fold it into the other ingredients, however, it became too watery and lost its texture and firmness. But if you have a technique that works, or if you're just a baking wizard, then stick to melting chocolate... & teach me your ways.

I then scooped out a bit of the insides so I could fill it with the chocolate mousse, and then I smoothed it out on the top to work as the frosting. To decorate my cakes, I drizzled on some fudge and plopped on a couple tiny marshmallows. Decorating is my favorite bit, but for these guys I could be messy instead of uniform or symmetrical. 

I hope you try making these scrumptious cupcakes! If you're a chocolate lover, I'm sure you'll love these! What's your favorite cupcake flavor/combination?

Besides chocolate, I do enjoy a good ole red velvet!

Much Love! Xx

4 Quick & Easy Breakfast Options For The Picky

I am someone who doesn't eat breakfast, like ever. Which is really sad because I want to like breakfast but there's so much standing in the way: 1) I always sleep in, 2) I get sick off of certain food items, and 3) I've never really strayed from the cereal, eggs, and pancake path, so everything is getting a bit old, if you know what I mean.

For my 'New Year's' Resolution, I wanted to eat more regular meals (and drink more water, but that's a different story), not sporadic meals. 9 times out of 10 I'd skip breakfast, nibble a bit for lunch, then grab something small for dinner depending on the day. Some day's I'd have class super late and wouldn't get home until 8 at night, or 11 if I was working. However, this semester my classes don't start until at least 12:30, which gives me plenty of time to get my beauty rest, take my time getting ready for school, and most importantly, sit down for breakfast.

With time on my side, I wanted to step out of my comfort zone and get a bit "crazy". Since I would consider myself a picky eater, I came up with a couple of different breakfast ideas that were quick, easy, and light on the stomach.

Idea #1 is a breakfast sandwich of sorts. It contains avocado, grape tomatoes, bread > toast, ham, a bit of cheese and an egg. I cut the tomatoes in half, then sliced the avocado into strips (I only used half the avocado to make one sandwich, but if you'd like two then you'd probably need the whole thing). I then toasted my bread while I fried my egg (Don't forget salt & pepper!). I also cooked up some honey ham not only to get it on the same level as the egg, but to get some of the added water out; since the ham is supposed to be for sandwiches. To assemble the sandwich I put the egg down first, then the ham, along with a handful of cheese (keep in mind my hands are small, so your amount of cheese will most likely be different). Next, I spread out the avocado (which you don't have to, but I thought that it would make it easier to make), and popped on a couple halved tomatoes. TA-DA, complete. Not going to lie, I was a skeptic when it came to adding avocado and tomatoes to a breakfast sandwich, but it creates a whole new taste and makes it fresh and healthy. I absolutely love this breakfast sandwich, and will most likely be having this more often! If you have any other breakfast sandwich combos, please leave me ideas down below; I'd love suggestions!

Idea #2 is your simple fruit and yogurt, but taken to the next level; parfait. I used, vanilla yogurt, chocolate granola, mixed berries & pineapple as my fruit of choice, chex cereal (corn & rice), and a bit of agave*. First, in a tall glass scoop in a couple tablespoons of yogurt to act as the base, then add a handful or two of granola. At this point I added my fruit, but you can do another layer of yogurt before the fruit. After the fruit, I did a layer of yogurt then a bit of chex cereal to give it a bit more crunch and a different taste (a good taste!). I did one final layer of yogurt and sprinkled some granola on top along with a couple pieces of berries and a drizzle of agave to make it look pretty. The fun thing about parfaits is that you can build them anyway you'd like with any ingredients you choose. The next time I attempt this, however, I'm going to do more layers of fruit and a bit more of the chex cereal because it was so good! If you give this a try, post it on twitter or instagram and tag me; I'd love to see your creations!

Idea #3 is your average bagel, but dressed up a bit. For the bagels you'll need; bagels (flavor of your choice), cream cheese, peanut butter, choice of fruit, agave*, and chocolate chips. I'm not a huge plain bagel and cream cheese fan, but I switched out a plain bagel for a blueberry one, and chose a strawberry cream cheese to accompany it for starters. Honestly, one half of a bagel & cream cheese is enough for me so one side I did the cream cheese, while on the other half I decided to spread a bit of peanut butter on. Sticking with the peanut butter half, I added the chocolate chips to give it a bit of crunch and come on, you can never go wrong with chocolate; yes even at 8am. Back on the strawberry cream cheese side, I sliced up a banana and placed them around the bagel, then plopped some raspberries in-between the bananas, and to top it off I drizzled a bit of agave to give it a sweet taste.

Idea #4 is a breakfast smoothie; perfect if you are in a hurry and want something on-the-go. I used; kefir, one banana, frozen strawberries, old fashion oats, and a teaspoon of agave*. Instead of kefir you can use yogurt or almond milk; I use kefir because it's easier on your stomach, but it's basically a watery yogurt. A smoothie is pretty simple; throw all of your ingredients in a blender and blend it up. Quick & easy! You can most definitely use ice, I don't because my blender is so old that it leaves chunks of the ice, no matter how long I blend it for. And yes, a blender is on my list for future purchases.

*Agave is basically the organic healthy version of honey, so you can absolutely use honey instead of going out to buy a bottle of agave!






I hope these breakfast options have given you some ideas if you're a picky eater like myself, or just want to try something new that is still quick and easy.

Much Love! Xx

Naked® Review

I've been trying to stay healthy since I've moved into my own place and so far it's been decent. Between my crazy school schedule and working random hours, I don't always get to sit down and have a full course. So, while I was at the store I decided to look into different juices that would give me all of the nutrients I need while giving a boost of energy and still tasting delicious.

I've heard many great things about Naked drinks, that I thought I would give them a try. It really sealed the deal when I walked into the store and saw that there was a sale going on. 'Perfect!' I thought, I can try a couple different juices since it was 3 for $10. I decided to pick up "The Green Machine", "Pomegranate Blueberry", and "Orange Mango". 

"The Green Machine"

I'd have to say this was my least favorite which makes me quite sad considering I had high hopes for this one. I think for myself, I was drawn to the fruits that were in it and then the spinach & kale, but didn't take into account for the wheat grass, ginger, garlic, and alfalfa. I mean, I'm pretty sure alfalfa is something you'd feed to rabbits or some sort of gerbil... or maybe I'm thinking of something completely different. Either way, I wasn't expecting all of the extra greens that are blended into the pulp that it is. I take that back, it's not really a pulp but it does have a thicker consistency like a smoothie. If you're a health nut and like all sorts of greens and protein, then this is the drink for you! With an overall calorie count of 140 (based on an 8oz serving), The Green Machine is packed full of Vitamin A and has a good handful of potassium. This drink really is 'BOOSTED'.

Rating: 5.9/10
Likely to buy again: Unlikely, unless I use it as a smoothie base and add other fruits to it.

"Pomegranate Blueberry" 

This was by far my favorite out of all three. Who doesn't love pomegranates and blueberries?! I mean if you don't, then I'll trade ya, or you could just give it to me. either way it's a win-win.  This juice is filled to the max with goodness; red grapes, green grapes, half an apple, handfuls of blueberries, and of course a pomegranate. I could literally drink this all day every day, it's that good. The consistency isn't thick at all (at least I don't think so), and it tastes super fresh. If you enjoy berry flavored drinks then this will not disappoint. This beverage has 150 calories (based on an 8oz serving), has 9% potassium, and 2% calcium. Doesn't exactly scream 'packed full of vitamins & minerals', but it is Purely delicious!

Rating: 9.9/10
Likely to buy again: VERY likely. In fact I know I will. 

"Mighty Mango"

This one was my second favorite. It was a bit thick, but not too bad. I'd say it has the same consistency as the Pomegranate Blueberry drink. If you enjoy citrus flavored drinks, but not too powerful on the citrus, then I'd say this drink would be a good one for you. It has mangos, oranges, apples, a bit of banana, and a splash of lemon. I wanted to give this drink a try because I've never really had a mango based beverage, so I thought this would be a good opportunity. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't my absolute favorite. I think If this was an orange based beverage with a hint of mango I would of loved it more. Don't get me wrong, it's still really good, but I think next time I'll pick up the 'Orange Mango' one and give that a try! With 150 calories (based on an 8oz serving), it has 100% Vitamin A and 10% Vitamin C! 

Rating: 8.1/10

Likely to buy again: Likely.

Overall, I really enjoyed these juices and I will certainly pick up more the next time I pop into the grocery store. I am starting to get more and more into these kinds of beverages so if you have any suggestions on any other brands and/or flavors, let me know in the comments! 

Here's to healthy choices!

Much Love! Xx

How I Keep My Hair Tame In The Winter

Living in the Midwest has it's ups and it's downs. Unfortunately the climate change in the winter is definitely a huge down side; It gets cold, dry, and windy. Trying to stay warm, yet fashionable is quite difficult during these months; you put a hat on and you get frizzy hat hair from the static, or you leave your hair down and gets whipped around from the wind.. not to mention your ears will get nipped at.

To solve this problem, I use 3 products during my morning routine to tame my dry frizzy hair, and keeping it soft and healthy.

First, I wash my hair with Toni & Guy shampoo and conditioner for damaged hair.

Then, once I am out of the shower I gently towel dry my hair and throw it up in that towel while I dry off, get dressed, brush my teeth, and apply my makeup. After that I take my hair down and apply a leave-in conditioner. The one I use is from my local barber shop and is part of the "olive oil" line. I use about 2-3 pumps of the product and apply it to my hair, starting at the tips and working my way up to the roots.

Once the leave-in conditioner is applied, I either blow-dry my hair if I'm in a hurry then apply a restoring oil, or if I'm staying in, I'll apply the oil and leave my hair to air-dry. Again, I use an 'olive oil' product, however I use a very tiny amount (I'm talking a pea size amount). A little bit goes a long way. Before applying it to my hair, I rub the product between the tips of my fingers and the top of my palm. I focus more on the bottom half of my hair than my roots, since I don't want my scalp to become oily right after getting out of the shower.

And that's it. I wash my hair every other day, and this method keeps my hair tame the entire time. I also made a video over on my youtube channel, if you'd like to check it out. It might be easier to see it visually than trying to decipher my descriptions and instructions.

Here are a couple additional tips that may or may not help tame your hair throughout these cold dreadful months.

Tip #1: Drink plenty of water. You want to stay hydrated all around the year, but it's important that everything is balanced so your body is awake and healthy. I must admit I'm not 100% sure that this will make a big difference, but every little bit helps, and you should be drinking around 60 oz of water each day anyway.

Tip #2: Along with keeping your body hydrated, make sure you're getting all of the nutrients you need. Eat full course meals and take vitamins daily. Another bit of advice is look into taking coconut oil supplements; something about it makes your hair soft and healthy.

Tip #3: Turn on a humidifier. If you don't already own one, I recommend you purchase a humidifier. You don't have to spend a lot of money on a big heavy duty one, but a cheap tiny one should suffice; although it depends on how big your living space is. The humidifier will put some moisture back into the air, relieving your dry skin and hair.

I hope this helps!

Much Love! Xx

Plastic Drawer Up-Do

I've probably mentioned this a thousand times here on my blog, but I have limited space in my apartment which can be tricky. Living in a studio apartment has really constrained me from bringing in unnecessary items or things that would take up way too much room. One of the biggest issues I faced was figuring out where I would store all of my clothes. Even though I have a decent sized closet, I have limited space on the bar to hang clothes and my jeans & sweatshirts take up all of the shelving. But what about those undergarments of mine? I debated on bringing my dresser with me, but I realized that it was too big & bulky, and I just didn't have the room for it. I finally figured out a convenient way to store my bras and panties: buying a plastic 3-drawer storage unit. It worked perfectly! I had a drawer for each of my undergarment pieces. However, I quickly found out that not only was it unappealing to guests to be able to see into the drawers but it made me a bit uncomfortable and self conscious. I could always close my closet doors, but I don't like doing that; It seems to make the room look smaller and bland. Since I am renting an apartment I can't exactly paint the walls or even the closet doors, so I have to settle with everything being white/cream. On the other hand, since everything is organized and put away nicely, having the doors open isn't an eye-sore, but instead gives the room a bit more to look at, and gives you a sneak-peak into my style/personality.

To fix this problem I took to Pinterest.. of course! And looked for different bits of inspiration. I had a couple ideas in mind but wanted to see how other people tackled this DIY. With some sense of direction, I took to the craft store and wandered up and down their scrapbook paper section. I found a nice 80 sheet paper pad that fit my color scheme and had some fun pattern play. I also picked up a small bottle of mod podge and I suggest picking up a sponge brush if you don't already own one. I forgot a brush and didn't feel like making the trip back into town, so I just used anything I could find in my apartment; q-tips, napkins, paper towel... although I eventually ended up using my fingers.. Hey, I had to improvise and it worked!

First, I measured the front of the drawer and cut out 3 rectangles to fit into place. I drew the line on the back of the paper with a pencil, so if I needed to erase I could do so without ruining the pretty side. Once they were cut out I had the option of leaving them as in and 'glueing' them in place, however, I thought it would be fun and a bit more unique to label each one. I picked out some metallic colors from my cup of assorted pens and sharpies. Since this unit was specifically for my undergarments, I labeled one "Panties", one "Bras", and the last one "Socks". That way I knew what was in each drawer. Then, to add a bit more character I drew little bras, panties, and socks, on each sign.

Lastly, I just needed to glue them in place. At first I tried spreading the mod podge over the paper, but soon found that it was quite difficult and I feared that it would ruin the design, writing, and/or the actual paper. So, for the other two, I applied the mod podge on the inner part of the drawer and then carefully laid the paper on top, making sure the words were facing outwards and right-side up. and smoothed out any bubbles with my hand. This method was easier and gave better results, in my opinion.

This was a super easy and fun DIY and quite inexpensive as well. I think the most expensive item was the pad of paper, but I can always use the other sheets for more crafts & projects. The thing about these storage units, is you can use them for ANYTHING, and there are so many different ways you can give them a facelift. You can use spray paint, duct tape, washi tape, construction paper, etc. Just have fun with it and customize it to fit your personality!

Much Love! Xx

My Bucket List

| Fly on a plane |

Yes, you read that right; I have yet to be on a plane. Even though it seems like something so little because thousands of people do this day to day, I find it very intriguing. Every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon I sit in my schools library in the back corner looking out over the courtyard and parking lots. The library is so conveniently placed on the third floor, so one can look in multiple directions and see for miles. My College just happens to be placed right next to the airport. And of course this city being the capital of the State there are many flights coming in and going out. Between classes I often find myself staring out into the cloudy blue sky daydreaming, thinking about anything but homework. I often catch a glimpse of that bird in the sky coming bigger & bigger and getting lower & lower to the ground before it dips behind the trees and disappearing from my view. It is during those moments that I crave adventure and exploring the world with my closet friends. 

| Travel |

 Yes, quite typical, but I want to see the world with my closest friends. Exploring places other than tourist destinations, trying exquisite foods, and experiencing different cultures. 

| Swim in the Ocean |

I've never been to the ocean, or really outside of my home state for that matter. I'd like to see dolphins & whales and just relax on the white sand beaches drinking a lemonade and taking in the sun. 

| Pet a penguin | & | Ride a Camel |

I'm not talking about at the zoo where the animals are in cages, I'm talking about out in their natural habitat. 

| Stay a night at Hotel Kakslauttanen |

This hotel is in Iceland and each 'room' is a dome outside under the stars where for 8 months out of the year you can witness the northern lights. Talk about breath taking! Growing up I always loved going camping, and this right here is taking camping to the next level.

| Build a tree house | 

Not any kind of treehouse, I'm talking about one straight out of the show "treehouse masters". If you've never seen this program, I suggest that you do so; it will bring out your inner kid. Basically this company in the US builds tree houses based on what each customer is looking for. They are bigger and better than the ones you had as a kid. If you can dream it, they can build it, and one day I hope they can make a custom one for me, high up in the trees with bridges between the different tree houses (inspired by the Ewok's in the last Star Wars film). 

| Attend Coachella |

I suppose any music festival for that matter, but I've seen some of my favorite Youtubers attend this festival and it just seems like a lot of fun.

| Do the Color Run |

Now I'm not one for running long distances, or just running period, but this seems like something that makes it a bit more enjoyable. I also would like to do an obstacle one such as a zombie run or the gladiator run. 

| Tour by helicopter |

Doesn't matter the location I just think getting a birds eye view of a city is something quite neat. 

| Go to a Drive-in Theater |

| Study Abroad |

It's always been a goal of mine to study abroad. Just experiencing the different cultures and getting the chance to go sight seeing. I would really like to go to England, but anywhere in Europe would be cool. 

| Visit a castle |

As long as there are no moats or dragons I'm all in! If only there were places like Hogwarts, I'd be jumping onto the next train there! 

| Attend a Chinese lantern festival |

Ever since I've watched Tangled, I've been so interested in attending one of these. It's incredible that the entire night sky could be filled with floating lights?! ... where do you think they end up? O.o

| Go horse back riding on a beach |

Something straight out of a romance film, but I think it would amazing! I really would like to do this on the beautiful shores of New Zealand or Greece. Just image you and your loved one galloping along the beach at sunset with a slight breeze.. Ahh, so romantic. But quite honestly it wouldn't even have to be with a significant other; it could be a group of friends. I think this would be a neat way to tour the place. Plus, I'd like to actually ride a horse; I've sat on one,  but never actually took the reins and moved around.

| Go cliff diving |

I'm not that much of an adrenaline junky but this seems quite fun. I don't think I'd go to the extremes and jump off a cliff that is higher than 40ft, but maybe 10-15ft is in my range.

| Live in England | 

My friends and I already have a goal of living near each other in England. while another friend is in Rome for Seminary. I've always wanted to visit England, it just seems so lovely there, other than the bipolar weather. And to hear that some of my friends have the same dream makes it even more possible. I can just imagine waking up on a chilly morning and going out for some coffee at a local shop with my friends and then spending the afternoon going in and out of shops.

| Be on the Amazing Race |

I know this is a long shot, but I have always enjoyed watching this program and think it would be a neat way to see the world and experience different cultures. Each challenge is something different but it's things that people in different parts of the world do on a daily basis. I always find myself watching these episodes thinking about which challenge I'd be better at and thinking of ways I could complete them the fastest. The only thing I'd be worried about is leaving something behind and letting the stress get to me. I know it's easier said than done but I think I would be a great contestant and would (hopefully) be in the final three. . . one can dream can't they? 

I know I have way more on my bucket list, but if I mentioned every single one, we'd be here all day. With that being said,

what's on your bucket lists? 

Much Love! Xx

Twenty-Sixteen Resolutions

2015 is literally a thing of the past. Can you believe that? I can' t ... I guess that's what happens as you get older; the day's blend and we get so caught up in our lives that we forget to slow down and take everything in. Before we know it, Thanksgiving sneaks up on us and shortly there after, Christmas is knocking at our door, or should I say sneaking down our chimneys? Once the hustle and bustle of the Holiday's are over with, we begin to settle down and realize that the year is nearly over; we're talking by only a couple of days. It's usually during those couple of days that I reflect on the year I've had and what I'd like to work on during the next.

Now, I'm not one to make huge silly goals for the upcoming new year, but with 2015 being so life changing and eye-opening, I'd like to set some goals and things to work on for 2016. Without further ado, here are my 2016 "New Year's Resolutions":

#1: Drink more water. Goals like this aren't unrealistic and is something I think should be on everyone's list to work on. I've realized during this past year how dehydrated I was each and every day; I was almost always tired even though I'd get 8+ hours of sleep and getting headaches almost daily. I seem to get caught up in my daily activities that I just forget to drink water; which seems quite silly, but hey, some how I've mastered it.

#2: Maintain a positive attitude. Everyone has their days where depression really kicks their butt. For me, however, I seem to suffer from depression more frequently. I'm hoping for 2016 to be positive and full of excitement and adventure. I'm going to try to re-wire my brain, and although I know I can't fully escape depression, I can at least make it minimal. I want to work on having a positive outlook on life and being genuinely happy each and every day. Maintaining a positive attitude also depends on who you surround yourself with, so with that being said I plan on blocking out the negative people in my life and focusing on those who support me and my decisions along with pushing me to be a better person.

#3: Work through my anxiety. Throughout 2015 my anxiety seemed to sky-rocket. Mainly due to a change in environment: College, work, and where I live. My anxiety seemed to stop me from doing many things, such as join clubs/go to events, hangout with friends/coworkers outside of work, explore my new city, etc. I think this was troubling because I didn't actually realize that I had anxiety and I wasn't fully educated on what it is. Now that I know that I have anxiety I look forward to educating myself about it and how to deal with it throughout 2016. With that being said, I hope 2016 will be the year where I can put a damper on this issue and allow myself to live a somewhat normal life.

#4: Focus on myself. Throughout the past year I really didn't give myself much 'me' time. For the first half of the year I had two part-time jobs, I was in college full time, and the rest of my free time was spent between my boyfriend, and attempting to spend an equal amount of time between my mom and my dad. I didn't really even have time to breathe or think. The rest of the year went by just as quickly as the first half. Day's seemed to blend together and before I knew it I was back in school trying to balance my time between school and work. I definitely need to slow down and worry about my health and well-being. I think that everyone needs time to themselves, even if it is just an hour or two a day or once a week. This year I plan on giving myself "Mental health days" where I can relax and not have to worry or be in a rush.  I don't want to regret anything nor look back and wish that I did this or that: No FOMO for me (Fear.Of.Missing.Out).

Do you have any New Year's Resolutions? 

Here's to making 2016 the best year yet! 

Much Love! Xx

2015 Recap

What a year it has been! I can't believe that 2015 is coming to an end... literally, there's like less than an hour left of it. Looking back at the year I've had, I can safely save that there were good moments, and there were bad moments. Unfortunately, I'd have to say that the bad out-weighed the good, but you live and you learn. That's life.

I can't think of any other way to sum up my year than by braking it down month-by-month. So, here you go:

January - Began 2nd semester of College.. not much really happened here.

February - This was a tough month. I started to struggle with college. I took on a huge course load: 16 credits = 5 classes. I ended up dropping my History class, because the work load was just too much. Between two jobs and trying to stay caught up in college, I became stressed and extremely depressed. By March, it had all become too much and I started shutting down. I skipped classes, and focused more on my jobs than anything. I remember late one night - I'm taking like 2 or 3am - I was on youtube and some how ended up watching a vacation kind of series by dailymix. This featured some well known British youtubers, and I instantly subscribed to nearly all of them. You may or may not know them: Zoella; Zoe Sugg, Thatcherjoe; Joe Sugg, Pointlessblog; Alfie Deyes ... etc. Long story short I ended up watching these youtuber's videos until the sun rose. They inspire me so much that it's really hard to explain. If I'm having a bad day, all I have to do is press play, and everything goes away for that short amount of time.

I'm not lying when I say I probably wouldn't be here if it wasn't for these inspiring people and my amazing coworkers, whom I all consider family. 

April - Started my own youtube channel. This made my life turn a complete 180; I became a lot happier and driven. Even though my first handful of videos weren't necessarily creative or that interesting to watch, it's helped me open up a lot more and has helped grow my confidence. It still is weird to talk to a camera, but it's starting to get easier. It might be silly to some people, but it's something I enjoy and I'm passionate about. It's okay if you don't understand.

May - Finals. Second semester hadn't gone as planned and I was scared for my future. I wasn't where I wanted to be in life and I had to step back to think long and hard about what my next step was. I tried getting through finals as best as I could, but still received devastating news: I was put on 'final probation'. This put an unbearable amount of stress on my shoulders and even put a strain on my relationship with my boyfriend at the time.

June - Met with an advisor to set up a plan for my future. Decided that moving to Madison, WI to attend MATC, would be the best for me. This felt amazing; so much stress was taken off my shoulders... I had a game plan! Unfortunately, after a month or two of having a rocky complicated relationship, my boyfriend and I broke up for good. We're still friends, but we were both headed in different directions and felt that it was best to separate.

August & September  - Moved 2.5 hours away from home into my first apartment! Which was a HUGE leap to make. And I began my Sophomore year of College at a brand new campus. If you'd like to read more about this new beginning for myself you can check out my post about it, [ here ].

In September, I also began this blog! I was inspired by one of my good friends who also has a blog; It's amazing! And I recommend you go check it out: Behind Hazel Eyes.

October - Received news that I got accepted into a Graphic Design Program! [Beginning spring 2016]

November & December - Volunteered for the Salvation Army as a bell ringer - Which you can read all about it [Here] - and pushed through finals; ending my third semester in College. I still had many moments throughout this semester where I wanted to give up and put College on the back burner, but it wasn't as much nor as bad as it was throughout my second semester. After thinking long and hard about it and discussing it with family members and close friends, I think that I finally made a solid game plan for my future.

Besides all of these milestones, I can tell that in one short year I have grown more as an individual and have learned more about myself each and every day. Looking back at the beginning of 2015, I was in a completely different place and it's weird to see who I started out with and now who I'm finishing the year off with; some for the better. If there is anything I've learned this year, it's to follow your heart and do what makes you happy. I've lost some good friends along the way but I've gained some amazing ones; one's that I hope will last forever.

I think as an individual I have come a long way; I've learned to be more independent and selfless. Not to mention all of the new responsibilities I've picked up since leaving the nest.  I have had some low moments with my anxiety, but I'm thankful to be surrounded by people who understand my situation. It was a rocky start to say the least, but I've learned so much in last 365 days, that I can't wait to see what I'll learn in the next 365.

What was your favorite 2015 moment? Let me know in the comments!

Much Love! Xx

A Christmas Tag

What's your favorite Christmas movie?
There's SO many good ones to choose from..  Here's a list of some of my favorites:

• Any Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer movie
• How the Grinch Stole Christmas
• Home Alone
• The Santa Clause 
• A Christmas Story
• A Charlie Brown Christmas
• Santa Claus Is Coming to Town

*Also, my mom has made me a bit addicted to the Hallmark channel this time of year, so pretty much any Christmas program featured is a good one too.

Do you open presents on Christmas morning or Christmas evening?
Christmas Morning

Do you have a favorite Christmas memory?
Not really a specific one, but I always enjoyed when we'd go to my grandparents house on Christmas Eve and have a family get together and open a couple presents with all of my cousins. Then on Christmas morning we'd get up really early open presents, eat breakfast, and watch Christmas movies.. nothing to spectacular. 

What's your favorite festive food?
I don't know if I have a favorite, but my dad always gets assorted nuts that you have to open with a nut cracker. Otherwise my mom does a lot of baking and her Christmas cookies are to die for. 

What's been your favorite Christmas gift?
I don't know if I have a favorite. I enjoy every gift I receive, no matter who it's from or what it is, it's the thought that counts and quite honestly, my favorite 'gift' would be spending Christmas together with my entire family. Family is so precious and we tend to get so caught up in our lives throughout the year, that we tend to lose sight of what's most important. I think Christmas is the perfect time to get together and cherish all of the memories we have had together while creating new ones. 
I'd like to add a second part to this question: What is one gift you'll never forget?
One gift that I will never forget would probably be a sweater I received from my dad when I was entering middle school. My parents had just got divorced a year or two previous to this particular Christmas and my dad moved out of the smallest apartment ever, into a house of his own. I don't think my dad did much Christmas shopping when my parents were together; he probably let my mom take care of that. Since money was still quite tight we only received one or two gifts and one of them was this yellow sweater that had buttons that reached from the bottom of my neck across to my armpit. I still remember it being the most itchy kind of fabric I have ever worn, but that sweater had a lot of meaning in it. Thinking about it now brings tears to my eyes, because he tried his hardest to pick out something that I might like, and for a divorced father to go clothes shopping for his only daughter ... oh man, the feels I just incorporated.. I think it's time to move onto the next question before I start sobbing over these emotions I've kicked up.

What's your favorite Christmas scent?
Probably the classic apple and cinnamon scent; otherwise the smell of Christmas trees.

Do you have a Christmas Eve Tradition?
Not really... like I said earlier we used to go to my grandparent's house on Christmas Eve and all of my cousins would be there and it was so lovely. Unfortunately, we haven't done that since my grandma passed away. However, I do go to an evening service at my church, since my dad plays trumpet and they dim down the lights and pass out candles. 

What tops your tree?

The tree in my apartment - nothing.

The tree at my dads house - an angel either myself or one of my brothers made when we were young.

The tree at my mom's house - Not too sure, it was a star for the longest time, now I don't know what it is.

As a child, what was the one (crazy, extravagant) gift you wanted but never got?
I really don't remember which is a bummer because I'm sure there was a lot. . . It's okay Santa (mom & dad), I forgive you. 

What do you think is the best part of Christmas?
Being with family and loved ones. The Christmas programs are always a plus as well! They are so fun to watch and always put me in a festive mood. It brings us together as families and for some of us, this may be the only time we get to see certain people. I cherish the time spent with those I love and I think that it is important and a good reminder of how we need to appreciate what we have and who we have in our lives. Christmas is a time where we set our differences aside and think about one another. I find it important to think about those who might not even have a family to go home to or buy gifts for. I ask that you all think about these people during the holidays and try to spread a bit of holiday cheer, whether that be donating money/volunteering your time, buying gifts for those who are less fortunate, or even saying a simple "Happy Holidays" accompanied by a warm smile will make a difference; It's the small things in life that can make someone's day. 

With that being said I hope all have a wonderful Holiday season, and remember to be selfless; "It isn't the size of the gift that matters, but the size of the heart that gives it" - Eileen Elias Freeman

Much Love! Xx

Hunting for a Christmas Tree

Every year, my dad, brother, and I go to a tree farm and cut down our own Christmas tree. This is probably my favorite tradition; hunting for the perfect tree is always so exciting; it has to be the perfect height, the bushiest, the greenest and you have to choose the type; short pokey needles, or long flimsy ones. Or in other words: do you want to stab your feet every time you walk past the tree or have a hard time hanging ornaments/keeping them on the tree? Picking out a winner and cutting it down is just the beginning; you then have to haul it to your car, tie it down, and transport it safely to your home without it falling off. But then it's the rewarding part: decorating!

Maybe it was because we went so late in the season, but I noticed that the lot was bare and the tree's weren't looking the best like they have in year's past. My guess is that the prime time for this lot is coming to an end and now the owners need to plant new trees and wait a few years for them to become Christmas tree candidates. Nevertheless however, we still managed to find a good one, and quite honestly I reckon that this was the fastest we have ever decided on a tree. Let me tell you how much of a big deal that is, because the Osterbrinks are extremely indecisive; I'm proud of us. 

 I highly suggest doing this if you don't already; it's a great family activity and gets you outside. Plus it's a lot more fun than going to a parking lot and picking one out that is pre-cut and tied in that netting.

Much Love! Xx

Ringing Bells

The semester has finally come to an end and I couldn't be happier. One of the classes that I took over the past 3 or so months was 'Psychology of Human Relations'. Back in August when I was signing up for classes I was reading through the descriptions of each class to see if it intrigued me and if I could handle the course load, since I'd also be working throughout the semester. When I stumbled upon this course I was immediately interested, however, when I was skimming through the requirements, I noticed that instead of a Final exam we had to perform a minimum of 10 hours of volunteer work... Oh no, I thought to myself; how will I be able to pull this off? I began to think of excuses to get out of it, since I was brand new to the location and had no idea of where to even begin looking for opportunities. I took the class anyway even though I knew at the back of my mind that I probably wasn't going to be able to do 10 hours of community service. How will I find a reoccurring event that will fit within my busy schedule? Not to mention the fact that my anxiety will most likely prevent me from doing something out of my comfort zone. As weeks passed by I grew more and more concerned about our final project. I tried reaching out to my professor, but she replied with "did you check the United Way website?" .. Why yes, I've checked every week since school started but still nothing works.

I almost gave up hope until I talked to an old friend who recommended going through the Salvation Army and volunteer as a Bell Ringer. I immediately looked into it and it was perfect; it fit my schedule, the shifts were short, and I didn't have to worry about traveling somewhere I didn't know since there were so many locations throughout the city. I picked out 5 shifts that fit within my schedule and the worry went away. I knew that this form of volunteer work would help keep my anxiety levels low. Even though this wasn't a direct form of helping someone; as in face to face, or one-on-one, I knew that my time was well appreciated and a small 2 hour shift helped raise money for those in need.

My job was simple: Stand next to the kettle, smile, and keeping ringing those bells. I’m sure you’ve seen these people scattered throughout the city, standing in front of stores ringing those obnoxious bells. But I assure you, the noise those tiny bells make are impacting lives in so many ways.

It was truly heartwarming to see people stop and donate, often holding people up just so they could scrape the bottom of their purse for loose change, or dig in their wallets to find a dollar bill. I was grateful for every bit of money that went into the bucket - even those who donated a penny made me smile. I couldn’t believe the generosity of some people, and don’t even get me started on the comments; they were all filled with gratitude. It was truly wonderful, even though I got sore from standing in the same place for 4 hours and shaking bells non-stop; it was well worth it! I was fortunate to be positioned inside, but I was still next to the entry where every once and awhile I got hit with a burst of cold air. I hate being cold and I couldn't imagine what it would have been like if I was outside for all of my shifts. But then I started to think about all of the homeless people forced to live outdoors, having to face the harsh winter elements that the midwest produces. The way I see it, is if they can handle the cold 24/7 I can stand it for a short 2 hour shift; in the end, being cold is well worth it knowing that I am making a difference in my community. 

After performing my 10 hours of community service I felt good, really good. After every shift I came to realize how much power that one shift can have, and I am ecstatic to have helped even the slightest. It really makes you appreciate everything you have; including a roof over your head. I think that a lot of people take the small stuff for granted. After performing my community service, I started look at my life differently. Sure I might be a college student with  just enough money to pay the bills each month, but I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and food in my fridge. I think that helping one another is something so incredible and I am blessed to have had the opportunity to experience this; it has made me look at life differently and has had an effect on my thoughts and actions.

When it comes to my future, I ultimately want to help people and give back to the community. I want to make a difference in the world and if I can, try to inspire at least one person. This small class project, was another push in the right direction; a confirmation that this is my calling. 

I think that if we all donate something someway or another, this world would be a better place. If you can't donate money, you can always donate your time. I highly recommend it. 

"The ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones that do."

Much Love! Xx

Winter Pinspiration

After doing an 'Autumn Pinspiration', I felt that it was only right to do one for winter. The weather so far hasn't been ideal; normally I enjoy the warmth and rain, but this is not like the Midwest at all. Over the weekend it got up to 60 degrees fahrenheit .. normally it's in the twenties this time of year, and this gloomy weather is bringing me down. I enjoy having snow throughout the month of December, so I'm hoping that Jack Frost will get it in gear and bring on the snow ASAP. Without further a do, here is what usually makes me happy this time of year, and hopefully this post will bring some Holiday cheer.

I have never gone ice skating, but I really want to; hopefully some of my friends will be up for it when I go back home. There's an ice skating rink that is located down town and is actually outside instead of in a hockey arena. They provide skates, for a fee of course, and I believe they sell hot chocolate; although I'm not 100% sure. It sounds like the best winter activity and I'm so excited to try it! I just hope the weather starts getting colder and snow starts falling from the sky ASAP! Wow - that is something you'll almost never hear from me! Other than ice skating, I enjoy being outside in the snow: making snowmen, building snow forts, having a snowball fight, tubing, driving around on the snowmobile trails etc.

All of the winter accessories that you get to pull out from your closet are always so exciting: scarves, mittens, that cute winter jacket, and of course knee high socks. I get cold quite fast during those brutal winter months that are drawing near, that some times I end up going out looking like Randy from "A Christmas Story", when his mother dressed him in his snow suit. . . not the prettiest sight, but at least I'm nice and toasty! (:

Sometimes I wish that I grew up in a small town that goes all out with their decorations. I think it just looks so lovely and festive. I've often heard stories from my mom that when she was younger the shops down town would decorate the square and Christmas lights would hang over the streets and walkways. In addition to the decorations, you'd be able to buy yourself a hot beverage, while you walk up and down the street popping into different shops or peering through shop windows to see Christmas toys and goodies [Much like in Christmas movies].

Growing up, my mom had the loveliest Christmas village that we would use to decorate above our kitchen cabinets, and let me tell you, at night when it was dark and that tiny village was light up in our kitchen, it was absolutely gorgeous and I wouldn't think of a better way to get you in the Christmas spirit. It was always a tradition to set it up together, but it took a lot of work and it was time consuming so I'd always imagine what it would be like to live in a place like that. There was an ice skating rink, a church, houses, and my favorite; a candy shop that made chocolate and/or fudge in the front window. Unfortunately, my mom now lives in an apartment and there is no place to put them, so they sit in a box in storage collecting dust. I hope someday in the near future I'll be able to bring them out and light them up at night like all those years ago. Just thinking about it brings warmth to my heart. 

So there you go, that is everything (for the most part) that represents what warms my soul throughout these chilly months. (:

What is your favorite Christmas tradition, or winter activity?

Much Love! Xx